Story Starters: Violence Folder: Domestic Violence File

Lead:  Abusive father emerges from counseling.

Synopsis
Heavily influenced by alcohol, Rob used to subject his wife and children to daily verbal, emotional, and sometimes physical abuse. His children, ranging in age from 10-18, were affected in a variety of ways. His 15 year-old daughter had no friends and repeatedly voiced her desire to leave the local school system, and his youngest son began to soil his pants. His oldest son started drinking heavily. All of the children's grades suffered.

With the help of Emerge, however, an organization that offers counseling for abusive men, the situation has begun to change. It has not been a fast process, yet after 48 weeks of group therapy and nearly 10 months of individual counseling, "Rob is now able to look at other people's point of view and calm down and listen to them." As evidence of the effects of this change, he and his oldest son now work as partners in a small carpentry business, while the fifteen-year-old daughter has, as her mother says, "blossomed into a happy, social cheerleader."

"Before Rob started Emerge," his wife Judy said, "he did not take the time to listen to the children and did not want to hear them talk. But referring to this past summer, Judy enthused, "It was the best summer we've ever had. He used to just drink and be gone, but now we have begun to focus on things like barbecues and trips that make us a family. The kids realize now that they can be heard."

Though domestic violence can be devastating, the verbal and emotional abuse that may accompany it can have equally devastating effects on spouse and children alike. (Psychological/emotional abuse and neglect, in fact, are included within the definition of "major types of maltreatment" by the National Center on Child and Abuse Neglect (NCAAN) Parental neglect and disdain, as well as the effects of witnessing abuse or violence in the home, impact children in various ways, including their school performance, social interactions, and self-esteem levels ( "Tips For Parents And Other Caregivers" in pamphlet from the Child Witness to Violence Project). Furthermore, children in abusive or neglectful situations are likely to exhibit these behaviors themselves (Correia, F. C., p.32)

Organizations like Emerge are helping men like Rob to recognize the power and necessity of patience, communication, and self-control. According to David Adams (link to Story Contacts), a program coordinator at Emerge, of the approximately 225 men who come for counseling each week, over 80% of them have children. Adams further commented on the need for men to finish the program, as studies have shown that nearly 40% of non-completers revert to abuse as compared to 28% of those who do complete the program (Gondolf, E. "Multi-site Batterer Intervention System Evaluation.)

It seems organizations like Emerge, though buoyed by the success of families like Rob and Judy's, face many challenges, no the least of which is getting their clients to complete the course.

Children's Voices
To read a story about domestic violence written by the children on the staff of Children's Express, click here.

Program
Emerge Chuck Turner, Coordinator or Training
2380 Massachusetts Avenue
Cambridge, MA 02140
(617) 422-1550

• Founded in 1977, Emerge was 1^st program for abusive men in the country
• Emerge works with the Transition House, a shelter for victims of battery, to offer education programs for teenagers and young adults
• Groups at Emerge meet once a week for two hours
• Counseling at Emerge is for the batterer only
• Each group has two counselors and approximately 12 members
• The Emerge counseling program is divided into two stages
• The first stage is an 8 session educational group
• The second stage can last up to 9 months and is a more self-exploratory experience
• Emerge offers a group for Spanish-speaking men, as well as other individual groups, including African-American men and Vietnamese men
• Emerge has centers in Cambridge, Quincy, and Lowell (click on any of these for further information about them—addresses, phone numbers, directions, etc.)