Crazy News
Ilana Traynis, M’12
As the M’12s can attest, and as the M’13s are probably beginning to realize, medical school changes you. You may remember yourself before you started at TUSM, when you were able to read the newspaper or talk to someone without thinking of or making reference to something medical. But now you find yourself updating your Facebook status with a biochem or neuro reference, or riding the T while thinking of all the bacteria the guy sitting next to you is harboring in his nasopharynx. Simply put, medical school has taken over, and not just your life, but how you see the world.
Thus, it should come as no surprise that even when reading the newspaper I cannot help but diagnose some of the notorious characters that have been making headlines recently. It seems that psychopathology class has made it impossible for me to see a person without classifying him or her as a cluster A, B, or C personality. When the country discovered that Bernie Madoff had defrauded thousands of investors and stolen billions, the headlines declared that he was “extraordinarily evil” and a “monster.” To me, his staggering disregard for anyone else seemed like a clinical case, of course. He acted deceitfully toward others, failed to honor financial obligations, and repeatedly preformed acts that are grounds for arrest. In fact, these behaviors are three of the seven qualities that point to a clinical diagnosis of Antisocial Personality Disorder. The only additional information we need to make a definitive diagnosis would be to find out if he used to beat-up his puppy in grade school.
Just a few weeks ago, it seemed pretty clear to the world that the mayor of Moscow, Yury Luzhkov, was also acting out of the ordinary when he announced his new plans for dealing with the winter weather. He promised the citizens of his frosty city that this winter there will be no snow. He plans to make good on his promise by hiring the Russian Air Force to seed the clouds – a chemical dispersed in the sky will cause the clouds to produce snow that dissipates before reaching the capital. Surely a person who is eager to play with such powers of nature must have delusions of grandeur. Fantastical beliefs that one is very powerful are often associated with bipolar mania. I just hope that this episode ends better than Mr. Luzhkov’s previous attempt to reverse the Ob River in Siberia, something that most scientists believe would lead to climate change in the Arctic.
By now we are all familiar with the balloon boy saga that unfolded this past week. When a Colorado family reported that their youngest child had flown away in a home-made flying saucer balloon, they set into motion a two million dollar rescue operation. Widespread news coverage followed. Several gut-wrenching hours later the balloon landed without the boy. It was then discovered that the boy was actually hiding in the attic of his home. Within several days both the child and mother had admitted that the entire incident was a hoax orchestrated by the boy’s father, Richard Heene, to garner media attention and to better market the family for a reality TV show. As it turns out, Mr. Heene had exhibited such unusual behavior in the past.
Mr. Heene describes himself as a scientist and storm chaser and has ridden his motorcycle into a tornado and reportedly flown a plane around the perimeter of a hurricane. This impulsivity of action, in addition to his documented fits of anger and delusions that he is the descendant of aliens suggest that Mr. Heene may be suffering from Borderline Personality Disorder. However, his need for attention showcased by two appearances on the reality TV show WifeSwap and his self-dramatization and theatricality may suggest Histrionic Personality Disorder. Given Mr. Heene’s belief of his own self-importance and his exploitation of his son, it would seem that Mr. Heene is a prime candidate for Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Perhaps the only conclusion that can be drawn from the sensationalized news about Richard Heene is that he most certainly has a Cluster B personality disorder. I suppose our only hope of finding a definitive diagnosis would be if Dr. Schindelheim conducted a full psychiatric evaluation, perhaps during an Interviewing class.